Wacky and Weird News

Anderson Hotel Evacuation

Pamela Anderson was forced to evacuate from her five-star hotel in Paris last week due to a gas leak.

But the former ‘Baywatch’ star wasn’t worried about the leak as much as she was concerned about being without her makeup bag.

A source told Daily Mirror, “She was mortified. Her curlers were still in and she was wearing a baggy bathrobe. She’d looked more like Nora Batty than a Baywatch pin-up.”

The insider added, “She begged the firemen to smuggle her through the kitchen. But they insisted on bundling her out the front door, where about 200 screaming fans were waiting.”

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Celebrities involved: Pamela Andreson 

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Madonna, 50 Years Of Wit And Wisdom

Digital Spy has made a list taking a look at things Madonna has said during her 50 years of life. She have always had her own opinion on different things, whether the subject has been sex, politics or religion.

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Madonna On Sex

• “My p***y is the temple of learning.”
• “Everyone probably thinks that I’m a raving nymphomaniac, that I have an insatiable sexual appetite, when the truth is I’d rather read a book.”
• “We lie right next to each other with our BlackBerrys under our pillows. It’s not unromantic, it’s practical.”

(On what goes on in the Ritchie bedroom.)

• “I think I have a d**k in my brain. I don’t need to have one between my legs. It would be like having a third leg.”

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Madonna On Men

• “I’m a romantic. I believe in true love and, you know, finding your soul-mate and all of those things, but I just don’t know about the whole marriage thing. I mean, what’s the point of it really?”

(Speaking to CNN’s Larry King - someone should have warned Guy!)

• “Maybe I’m a gay man in a woman’s body.”
• “Why did God create men? Because vibrators can’t mow the lawn.”
• “Strong women love big hickies.”

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Madonna Being Controversial

• “Crucifixes are sexy because there’s a naked man on them!”
• “If you don’t like my attitude, then you can f**k off. Just go to Texas and you can suck George Bush’s d**k.”

(Madonna onstage at the Coachella music festival.)

• “Most priests are gay.”

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Madonna Being Weird

• “I love Cadbury’s Fruit And Nut, Crunchies and Maltesers, but my absolute favourite is a Cadbury’s Creme Egg. They are totally deadly but so delicious.”
• “I love horses. I think I may have been one of Henry VIII’s knights in another life, riding through a great forest.”
• “You can’t go to London and not start drinking Guinness, and I have been known to eat fried fish and French fries. When in Rome, right?”

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Madonna On Madonna

• “I want to be like Gandhi and Martin Luther King and John Lennon… but I want to stay alive.”
• “I wanted to make people happy. I wanted to be famous. I wanted everybody to love me. I wanted to be a star. I worked really hard and my dream came true.”
• “I live for meeting with men in suits. I love them because I know they had a really boring week and I walk in there with my orange velvet leggings and drop popcorn in my cleavage and then fish it out and eat it.”

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Madonna On Her Critics

• “The ones that said I was talentless, that I was chubby, that I couldn’t sing, that I was a one-hit wonder. They pushed me to be better, and I am grateful for their resistance.”

(Madonna at her recent induction into the Rock ‘N’ Roll Hall of Fame.)

• “Better to live one year as a tiger than a hundred as a sheep.”
• “Listen, everyone is entitled to my opinion.”

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Akon “Stunned” By Jackson’s Behaviour

Akon has recalled how he was left “stunned” by Michael Jackson’s behaviour.

The hip-hop artist told the Daily Star that Jackson asked him to come to the cinema with his family. Ready to go, he discovered that the pop-star was wearing only pyjamas and a head scarf.

Akon revealed: “I was like, ‘Are you going out like that?’ He was in his pyjamas and I was waiting to see if he was going to change. He grabs a scarf and puts it around his head.”

“Then, he grabs the kids and puts a scarf around their heads. So I grab a scarf and put it around my head, and off we go.”

Jackson features on the track ‘Hold My Hand’ on Akon’s new album Acquitted.

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Celebrities involved: Akon, Michael Jackson 

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Pete ‘Told Inmates About Moss Sex Life’

Supposedly junkie rocker Pete Doherty told inmates at Wormwood Scrubs all the details about his sex life with Kate Moss.

According to the Daily Star, the rocker revealed intimate details about their romance to fellow prisoner Tony Sansom.

Sansom said: “We all used to smoke weed together in my cell. I thought he was a nice lad. I knew he was famous, but I didn’t know anything about him.

“He told us about one crazy night in Italy, where loads of X-rated things went on. It sounded like a wild time and I think everybody who heard his story was pretty jealous… He said Kate wore him out and he wasn’t sure if he could cope with her anymore.”

Doherty confessed that after telling everything about his and the super model’s bedroom secrets, the prisoner could easily write a book called Kate On A Plate.

“I knew it was going to make a stunning book because he had so many stories to tell,” said Sansom. “He was laughing his head off when he told me about an incident in the toilets of a well-known department store in London.

“The security guard caught him doing naughty stuff in there and turfed him out.”

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Celebrities involved: Kate Moss, Pete Doherty 

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Metcalfe Wanted To Be Lap Dancer

Jennifer Metcalfe has claimed that when she was a little girl, her ambition was to become a lap dancer.

The soap actress told News Of The World, “‘I had ambitions, although they were misguided. I’ll always remember the look on my mum’s face when I declared: “When I grow up, I’m going to be a lap dancer.”

“I assumed it was a glamorous job.”

At the age of 12, the young girl decided no more dreaming of becoming a lap dancer. Now I want to be a prostitute. She says, “When I was 12 I watched Band Of Gold and decided I wanted to be a prostitute!”

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Celebrities involved: Jennifer Metcalfe 

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Sharon’s Rage At Jeffries For Calling Daughter Kelly ‘fat and ugly’

Sharon Osbourne is a real mother lion. When TV comic Jim Jeffries called her daughter unattractive and fat, Sharon got furious and sent a scathing email to the Aussie comic, telling him to ‘f*** off’, reported Daily Mail.

Jim was presenting awards in April and made a joke to Kelly saying that she wasn’t as attractive as Agyness Deyn. The singer responded with a string of expletives, to which Jim replied, “I think she’d be famous even if she wasn’t Ozzy’s daughter - she’s that good.”

It seems like Kelly was offended by this, because she spat in the comedians face. Jim said, “‘I thought that would be the end of it but I got an email from Sharon which said, ‘Dear Nobody. Wait until you’re a celebrity before you criticise REAL celebrities. Why don’t you f*** off ‘.”

Well, but Jeffries isn’t goosecap, he replyied, “Dear Sharon. After you had all that plastic surgery and had the fat sucked out of your thighs, why did you pump it into your daughter’s face?”

Osbourne’s representative refused to give any comments.

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Celebrities involved: Jim Jeffries, Kelly Osbourne, Sharon Osbourne 

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15-Year-Old Girl Wants To Be The Next Jordan

Emma Hughes wants to be a surgically enhanced glamour model just like Jordan and she has her mom’s full support. Ashley Hughes (the mother) works at five different cleaning jobs to help her daughter to fulfill her dream. She has already spent £15,000 on salon treatments and now is saving for a breast enlargement operation for her daughter when she turns 18 and for tooth veneers to enhance Emma’s smile. Also, Emma’s mom has hired a sunbed for her daughter so that her skin can be brown all year round.

Mrs Hugher told Hello! magazine, “When Emma was 13, we watched a documentary on glamour models, including Jordan. Emma said, ‘I’m prettier than her. I want to be a glamour model’.”

“Now I hold down as many jobs as I can to ensure she’ll have all the beauty treatments, tanning sessions and cosmetic surgery she needs to achieve her dream.”

Emma praises Jordan and wants to be just like her, “Jordan’s my idol. She’s turned a modelling career into books and a TV show. She’s made millions.”

“I have to look the part. I’m already planning a boob job so they look more like Jordan’s, despite the fact that I’m already a 34F.”

Because of Emma’s young age she’s not allowed into a tanning salon, so her mom hired her a bed. The girl says, “I usually tan for ten minutes in the morning and the same after school. I’m not worried about the health warnings. I feel great having a tan. I try to remember to use sunscreen but I tan faster without.”

Her mom adds, “I’m not worried about this tanorexia nonsense, or skin cancer from sunbeds. It hasn’t affected her health. It’s making her confident and beautiful. All the treatments will give her the edge. They’re going to help her be a star.”

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Celebrities involved: Ashley Huges, Emma Hughes, Jordan 

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Sarah Jessica Parker’s Bird Calling “Skill”

Sarah Jessica Parker attempted to show off her bird calling “skill” on Letterman on Thursday night.

After her serious attempt, the Sex and The City star, whistle out her impersonation and wow that got the crowd to applaud!

Such a “talent.”

Click Here to watch Sarah Jessica Parker making a fool out of herself on Letterman.

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Celebrities involved: David Letterman, Sarah Jessica Parker 

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